When Crave launched its Wii Disaster Watch mini-feature a little over a week ago, many of you scoffed (light-heartedly) that you had to be a total idiot to bash up your TV or yourself with a video game controller. Well, that just doesn't seem like the case, unless you want to argue that humans are innately stupid. (Over here, the jury's still out on that one.) The latest news outlet to pick up on Wii disasters is Yahoo. Even the normally celebrity-gossip-focused Best Week Ever is on it. And in case you haven't seen it yet, there's a whole Web site, Wii Have A Problem, devoted to the phenomenon.
I think it's safe to say that the potential for Wii mishaps is now a fully documented phenomenon. We probably no longer need public service announcements whenever someone accidentally flings a Wiimote at his frat brother. But if something really awesome happens, like if Steve Wozniak figures out how to play Wii polo on a Segway. That's a disaster in and of itself.
They keep rolling in. Thanks to a Crave tipster, we found this hilarious YouTube video by user "RobotsPiratesNinjas." Set to Queen's "We Will Rock You," the clip details the antics of a group of teenage boys who claim to have accidentally smashed a light fixture in a Wii Sports tennis overhand serve. Even if they're exaggerating, it's still a pretty funny video. Especially with that soundtrack.
Additionally, Kotaku has posted a link to Nintendo's official safety precautions regarding the Wiimote and its tendency to fly out of players' hands and smack into stuff like TVs, lamps, and cats. My favorite line: "If you are having so much fun that you start perspiring, take a moment to dry your hands."
Wii will, wii will rock you.
Yup, it's happened. The visual evidence of Wii disasters is starting to hit YouTube, and I'm carving out a front-row seat, popping some Orville Redenbacher, and...okay, I'll lay off on the movie theater metaphors.
You know, here at Crave we are usually nice, upstanding bloggers who don't like to have too many laughs at peoples' expenses (except each others'), but YouTube changes things a bit. I mean, it's not like most of these things are done with hidden cameras. When YouTube user "seamonkey420" filmed a video of his father's impressive hand injury from smacking into a stove while playing Wii bowling, I'm sure the dad in question was aware of the filming and subsequent YouTubing. Plus, you can't really see his face. So this, in my opinion, is fair game.
By the way, if you pass out at the sight of a small amount of blood, you might not want to watch this clip.
"All those flailing arms can sometimes inadvertently smack into lamps, furniture and even competing players. IGN.com, a popular site that reviews videogames, said one player testing the Wii lost her grip and sent the controller flying into a wall. Blaine Stuart of Rochester, N.Y., mistakenly whacked his fiancee, Shelly Haefele, while playing tennis and also accidentally hit his dog while bowling." -- Jamin Warren, The Wall Street Journal, 11/25/06
Remember that episode of "The Colbert Report"--okay, maybe you don't remember it, because not everyone is as active a member of the Colbert Nation as I am. Anyway, there was this "Colbert Report" episode that detailed the media aftermath of the incident in which Colbert convinced a congressman to declare that cocaine was "a fun thing to do" on-air. Showing clip after clip of network newscasters debating the potential dangers of politicians' appearances on his Comedy Central fake-pundit show, Colbert gleefully declared that it proved that "The Colbert Report" didn't just present the news, it was the news.
Anyway, you're probably wondering how this could possibly be related to Crave's official Wii Disaster Watch feature, so here we go. Last week, we posted the first installment of the Wii Disaster Watch, our tongues lodged so firmly in our cheeks that we couldn't speak intelligibly. The reader response was mixed, to put it lightly. (Hey guys: Sometimes blogs post about things that aren't necessarily newsworthy. Duh.) But here's the thing. Clearly, Cravers aren't the only ones with Wii flub-ups on the brain. The Wall Street Journal appears to be in agreement. And that makes this Crave blogger just as gleeful as Stephen Colbert's TV persona was when he proudly showed off mainstream news anchors' takes on Rep. Wexler's cocaine one-liner. Wii injuries are, as Crave predicted, quite likely going to be the next big thing. I'm still crossing my fingers for the first "America's Funniest Home Videos"-style Wii moments to show up on YouTube.
The bottom line: Yup, video games can hurt, and not just in the awkward emo way from back in third grade when you failed to beat King Bowser in Super Mario Bros. right in front of that girl/boy/etc. whom you were trying to impress. They can cause real live pain.
I had a conversation with some other reporters at a bar a few days ago concerning Nintendo's new console, the Wii. It was an amusing, lengthy, and oft-tangential conversation, as chats in bars often are. But here's the gist of it: People are going to get hurt from this Wii phenomenon. Knowing gamers' proclivity for getting thoroughly absorbed in the art of playing, what's going to happen now that the "Wiimote" is around?
Well, we're here to tell you.
Yesterday, gaming blog Joystiq posted about a guy whose Wiimote wrist strap broke and smashed in his TV screen. A second TV-smashing horror story, this one from a 7-year-old girl playing Wii Sports' bowling game, showed up on Engadget. And then someone on the Cheap Ass Gamer forum posted some pictures of a Wii-destroyed laptop screen. That's three instances, and as any journalist can tell you, three's not just a pattern, it's a freaking trend.
But this isn't enough. We want to see some minor bodily injuries! So if you've got more Wii disaster tales to alert us to, fill us in. Bonus points to the first person who can direct us to a YouTube video of a two-player Wii match in which one player accidentally smacks the other in the face.
Get ready to pass the popcorn!
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