Crave

This is an iPhone. Tomorrow, there's probably going to be a new iPhone.

(Credit: CNET Networks)

I guess the thinking is if you toss enough possibilities in the air, at least one of them will come down right.

For example this Sunday morning, the Internet suggests that Apple's new iPhone might be cheaper. That it might be thinner. That it might have video chat. That it might have GPS. That it might come with a four-core chip. That it might be late. That it might be here already.

Hopefully, that clears everything up. Come back tomorrow for live coverage of Apple's Worldwide Developers Conference, when the company is expected to reveal actual details about its next-generation iPhone 2.0.

A goofy marketing gimmick plants Geek Squad 'agents' in select cities' theaters near screenings for 'Sex and the City,' designed to help male patrons escape the chick flick.

(Credit: Geek Squad)

The movie spinoff of Sex and the City hits theaters Friday, and if the estrogen-fueled near-rioting at its New York premiere is any indicator, it'll be a cinematic event of such shriekingly girly proportions that the average straight man is bound to run and hide.

But Geek Squad, the electronics help service owned by Best Buy, saw it as a potential marketing opportunity. I got an e-mail pitch in my inbox on Thursday explaining a gimmick that the company's pulling in a few cities geared toward men who have been dragged to the theaters for Sex and the City by wives, girlfriends, moms, co-workers, and other female tormenters.

"Not even the Geneva Convention can save us from the torture about to hit screens tomorrow," the release read. "Sure, Sex and the City will be adored by fanatic females that sip cosmos, adorn Manolos and look for their Mr. Big to get them out of credit card debt, but what about the unfortunate men that get dragged to this film?"

Consequently, Geek Squad "agents" will be stationed at select megaplexes in New York, Chicago, and Los Angeles to hand out promotional packets containing excuses for maneuvering one's way out of the movie at the last minute, along with quarters for use at the nearest video game arcade. The message: Look, Geek Squad won't just fix your computer, it'll fix your sense of masculinity!

Cute. But here's my advice to the men of the world: If your significant other is making you go see this pink-and-fluffy pastiche, grow a backbone and say no. Unless you forced her to go see 300 with you. Then you're obliged.

Hotties? Definitely. But I wonder what they would've said if I'd asked them if they know who Steve Ballmer is.

(Credit: Caroline McCarthy/CNET News.com)

This post was updated at 4:50 AM PT on March 4 with comment from a Microsoft representative.

NEW YORK--So, on Monday night, Microsoft threw a party for its brand new Office Live Workspace, also known as Redmond's answer to Google Apps. Held at the Twelve21 nightclub in Manhattan's Flatiron District, the guests of honor at the event were Doug Ellin, creator and executive producer of the HBO series Entourage, as well as executive producer Rob Weiss and star Jeremy Piven (you know, "Ari").

I'm always down for a good time with software geeks, so I rolled in hoping to find some people willing to talk about whether Office Live Workspace really is a formidable answer to the Google Docs that I've found myself using pretty frequently. Instead, I walked in to find that the open-bar party was full of models. You know, the sort you'd see at Fashion Week, not a Microsoft party. And aside from my esteemed colleague Natali Del Conte of CNET TV, the only two people I recognized there were Pop17 video host Sarah Meyers and CrunchGear blogger (and local tech party staple) Nicholas Deleon.

Yes, there's an Office Live Workspace logo, but let's face it, everyone was interested in the free drinks instead.

(Credit: Caroline McCarthy/CNET News.com)

Logos for the new Web-based software were everywhere, but the hotties in attendance didn't seem to care, making a couple of us bloggers wonder if maybe they'd been hired to show up and look good. A half dozen computers set up with demos of the Office Live Workspace beta were ignored, for the most part. Jeremy Piven, meanwhile, remained squarely in the VIP section. It was certainly a party, but it definitely wasn't much of a launch party.

A Microsoft representative provided me with an explanation via e-mail. "This was a party that included users of Office Live Workspace from the limited beta program, some press and analysts as well as guests of Jeremy, Doug and Rob," the e-mail read. "Not a typical Microsoft event, but major milestone for the product and we did want to celebrate it."

Oh, well--thanks for the invite and the free Stella Artois, Microsoft. I had a decent time, and I know you guys in Redmond like to put on a big spectacle, but seriously it's O.K. to invite nerds to parties. We're very social, honestly.

(Credit: RifleGear.com)

This was sent to us by a tipster. I don't normally spend my time reading RifleGear.com, but from the likes of this item, maybe I should.

Awhile back we were treated to a hilarious Photoshop job called the HK-47--an assault rifle decorated with images of everybody's favorite nonpornographic, nontentacled Japanese import, Hello Kitty. We were sad to learn that it was, well, Photoshopped.

But now, out of nowhere, here's a real one. As a protest against assault weapons bans, one rifle enthusiast in California decided to create a weapon that would "alleviate the fears of (his) fellow citizens and gun-banning legislators when (he) put together a new AR-15 for (his) wife." So he modded the AR-15 to make it baby-pink with an image of Hello Kitty holding a weapon, as well as some extra-cute cartoon flowers! Brilliant!

Unfortunately, according to certain other people who write for this blog, Hello Kitty won't make an assault rifle any less terrifying. Apparently, that cat is trying to take over the world.

(Credit: Neiman Marcus)

Luxury retailer Neiman Marcus sells this wacky $50,000 tent that hangs in a tree. No joke. I thought the only thing you hung in a tree when you were camping was the "bear bag" of food so that Yogi and Boo-boo couldn't get into your pic-a-nic basket.

Apparently not. The "Treetent," designed by Dutch designer Dre Wapenaar, looks kind of like something out of Sleeper, and did I mention it hangs in a tree and costs $50,000? It also comes with a 9-foot-diameter wooden floor (um, OK) and a "groovy round mattress" that sleeps two adults.

Mr. Wapenaar, Crave has a few questions for you.

One, how are you supposed to get the tent into the tree?

Two, how do you get into the tent once it's in the tree?

And three, how the heck are you supposed to, um, partake in activities that may shake the tent up a bit? Will you fall out of the tree? Come on, dude, if you say it "sleeps two adults" and mention a "groovy round mattress," you have to keep that in mind.

(Via Uncrate)

Fox might mean business, but it also means unintentional comedy.

(Credit: Fox Business Network)

The Writers Guild of America can keep up its strike--there's plenty of unscripted comedy on the fledgling Fox Business Network.

On its morning show, Money for Breakfast (full disclosure: I have been a guest on Money for Breakfast), anchor Alexis Glick accidentally reported that Apple had taken an 8 percent stake in chipmaker Advanced Micro Devices.

"There's some news coming across the tape right now," Glick said on the live program. "We're seeing from Wall Street Journal that Apple is buying an 8 percent stake in AMD."

Money for Breakfast host Alexis Glick

(Credit: Fox Business Network)

In fact, it was the government of the United Arab Emirates state of Abu Dhabi, not Apple, that had purchased the stake in AMD. Yes, yes, I know Steve Jobs' Cupertino empire really could be mistaken for a cash-flooded sovereignty sometimes. But let's be serious. Apple? Abu Dhabi?

When the mistake became clear, Glick's co-host, Peter Barnes, said, "Oh, the Arabs. OK." To make matters worse, the program even referred to the country incorrectly, as "Abu Dubai," not "Abu Dhabi."

Even funnier, contributing analyst Charles Payne--the founder and CEO of Wall Street Strategies--had gone right along with the gaffe. "That's real smart by Apple because AMD is in trouble right now," he had said to Glick. "AMD has always had two problems: either it had a great product that was either sometimes superior to Intel but not the distribution, or it would have a terrible product that obviously they couldn't compete."

Never mind the fact that Apple has been stocking its computers with, um, Intel chips, and has been doing so for over two years. If Jobs & Co. had bought a stock in AMD, that'd be beyond huge news.

It doesn't look like any video of the snafu has surfaced (yet), but check out the transcript, courtesy of the Silicon Alley Insider. It literally reads like something out of Anchorman or a Saturday Night Live skit:

The Staten Island Ferry, the cheapest booze cruise in town!

(Credit: Creative Commons/Wikipedia user KMF164)

And no, it's not about their names.

A group called the Richmond County Young Republicans has issued an open letter to Facebook and its CEO, Mark Zuckerberg, asking them to check up on their geography.

Richmond County, after all, is the same entity as the New York borough of Staten Island, and if you're creating an event on Facebook, you apparently can't list the location of the shindig as "Staten Island." The closest location, reportedly, is "Staten Island Junction, N.J." (And there's nothing that a New Yorker hates more than being associated with Jersey.)

"This hits a sore spot with us and our members," the letter to Zuckerberg read, "as Staten Island has a reputation as the 'forgotten borough' of New York City." Come on, that is totally not true, guys! Everyone in New York knows that the Staten Island Ferry doesn't charge for the ride and sells some of the least expensive beer in the city, making it the cheapest booze cruise in town!

Additionally, Facebook doesn't totally ignore Staten Island. The social network does operate a "regional network" for the borough, as well as regional networks for New York itself and the neighboring boroughs of Manhattan, Brooklyn, and the Bronx; several cities within the remaining borough of Queens, like Long Island City and Astoria, have their own regional networks.

Facebook representatives do not appear to have issued a statement in response.

(Full disclosure: CNET News.com's Caroline McCarthy lives in Manhattan, where yes, we make fun of Staten Island, but not as much as we make fun of Boston, Philadelphia, New Jersey, Long Island, Westchester County, Connecticut, or Williamsburg.)

The more Microsoft events CNET sends me to around New York (the Windows Vista launch weekend, Halo 3's raucous little debutante ball), the more I realize one thing: No matter how much Gates, Ballmer, & Co. seem to always have issues (like that "Zune" debacle), that company knows how to throw one hell of a party. I'm not kidding. It even has its own wine now.

Created by South African winery Stormhoek especially for Microsoft, the "Blue Monster Reserve" sauvignon blanc is accompanied by the tagline "change the world or go home." It's only available to Microsoft employees, members of a "Friends of Blue Monster" Facebook group, or Stormhoek insiders. The cute little logo was designed by Stormhoek marketing strategist Hugh MacLeod of gapingvoid.com.

This, for the record, furthers my speculation that Microsoft is actually the Dharma Initative.

But, that said, this really isn't that big of a surprise. I speculate that Google has a half dozen tasty custom microbrews on tap in the Googleplex at all times. I've also heard this rumor that Steve Jobs has commissioned a wheatgrass-infused organic sake that was uncorked shortly after the iPhone launch. Don't even get me started on the juicy gossip about Mark Zuckerberg's plans to make Facebook-branded Smirnoff Ice as iconic a part of his image as those Adidas sandals.

And here at CNET, you might not know that we have our own private-label scotch! It has been absolutely instrumental recently as Craver-in-chief Mike Yamamoto attempts to deal with Tim Moynihan's robo-hellraising.

(Via PSFK)

It is a truth universally acknowledged that one-time pop darling Britney Spears' performance at the MTV Video Music Awards earlier this month was a total and utter trainwreck.

Chris Crocker's 'Britney manifesto'

(Credit: YouTube)

But, as viral video fans soon learned, some crazy guy with a YouTube account didn't agree. He promptly put up a clip of questionable sanity in which he lay in bed, sobbing, begging us haters to "Leave Britney Alone." The video has racked up nearly 8 million views on YouTube, reaching a degree of overkill that's made many of us hope the buzz will fade away quickly or give way to some other irritating pop-culture sensation.

But don't hold your breath. That impassioned young fellow is Chris Crocker, a 19-year-old from Tennessee whose 15 minutes (seconds?) of fame just might not quite be over: Variety is reporting that a television production company, 44 Blue Productions, has inked a deal with him for a potential TV show. It's not totally serendipitous, as the entertainment site explained that Crocker has actually had a sizeable MySpace following for some time now, and that he's been on 44 Blue's radar for almost a year.

"(The show is) going to pretty much be the 'Chris Crocker experience,'" 44 Blue co-founder Rasha Drachkovitch told Variety. "We consider him a rebel character that people will find interesting. He's going to be a TV star." In other words, they're catering to the Perez Hilton demographic.

Is nothing sacred anymore?