Crave

(Credit: Akihabara News)

No sooner did we post an item about an ill-advised promotional tchotchke that another one has popped up on the radar. But unlike the previous gadget, this one isn't of dubious value because of anachronistic timing; rather, it would be questionable no matter when it came out.

The reason: It's a paper clip dispenser. Not that we have anything against paper clips, mind you, but we can't exactly see the point of a dispenser that's also a pen holder with USB ports.

Hong Kong-based Earth Trek is trying to cast this in the best possible light, referring to it as a "3-in-1 stationery item" available in five colors. But if they're going to take this tack, the least they can do is provide a place to keep one's beer.

(Credit: Brando)

The mad inventors at Hong Kong-based Brando are at it again, hard at work developing products of little or no use. And its latest offering ranks right up there with the MP3 stylus on the practicality meter.

As ridiculous as it may seem, the Car Projector Clock does exactly what its name indicates: It projects a digital readout on an interior surface, as seen on OhGizmo, not unlike bedroom versions that beam a display on the ceiling. You might ask why someone would need this--and, therefore, why it was created--especially when most if not all cars already have a clock somewhere on the dash. But you've got to consider the source. This is, after all, the same company that makes aromatherapy speakers and combo mouse label makers. Nuff said.

(Credit: Brando)

Well it's about time. Like everyone else, we've been pining for a combo USB Aroma Radio/Speaker for some time.

Apparently the insane but driven R&D staff at Hong Kong's Brando was determined to one-up the competition, which includes aromatherapy gadgets in the form of USB humidifiers and fragrance oil burners. Brando's version not only tickles the olefactory senses but also pipes in the music from your MP3 player and provides mood lighting in seven LED colors.

For optimum relaxation, be sure to use this on a computer with at least two USB ports. Because you'll want to reserve the other for the perfect complement, a mouse massage.

Here, Mr. Tengu reacts to the U.S. Senate's ethics reform bill.

(Credit: Solid Alliance)

Ah, if only all your pals could display a limited range of emotions, sit silently on your desk, and draw power from a USB port.

Yes, these dreams can come true with Mr. Tengu, the latest USB toy sold by Japan's Solid Alliance.

Mr. Tengu reacts to various noises with light-up facial expressions. Just like normal human beings, Mr. Tengu's facial "emotions" include large block-mouth, narrow block-mouth, oval mouth, and mouth-that-turns-into-a-secondary-face mouth. A full chart of Mr. Tengu's multiple moods can be seen here.

Of course, you may know Solid Alliance as the retailers of such USB hits as USB Humping Dog, USB You Can Wedge In Your Ear Canal, and Baby With Giant Eyeball Head: The Webcam.

[Via The Raw Feed.]

(Credit: Umine)

When I was a kid, we had those gadgets sold in the "well-being" section of Bed Bath & Beyond--you know, alongside foot massagers and home-spa kits and other things that I never thought anyone actually bought--and their whole schpiel was that they'd play you the soothing sounds of forests at night, crashing waves, chirping songbirds, or something else that was supposed to block out your neighbor's annoying dog. Or kids. Or garage chemistry lab.

But now, apparently, the Digital Age of Excess 2.0 demands that everything be a little bit fancier and more ridiculous than its late-20th-century equivalent. That's probably why sound machines now need to be sight-and-sound machines. This Japanese "Healing Theater Umine," for example, will display a variety of visualizations that go along with the usual New Agey sounds--tropical beach, underwater, swimming with dolphins, rainforest, what-have-you. Alternately, you can hook up your MP3 player, just in case that iPod is loaded with even better swimming-with-dolphins noises--or in case you want to accompany the light show with a little bit of Dead and any questionable substances whose use we absolutely do not condone.

It's $84, which I would only be willing to pay if there were also a "loud urban traffic" setting, which could help me go to sleep should I find myself without the usual lullaby of sirens, car horns, and bar patrons.

There are plenty of night sky visualization devices out there, but this is the first one we've seen that branches beyond the cosmos. It comes from TakaraTomy, which as you may recall, has also brought us the floating planet balloons that are about thirty years too late: I'm sure the Dark Side of the Moon crowd would've dug them before they had kids and turned into yuppies.

(Via Technabob)

(Credit: LiveScience)

If you insist on joining the LED parade but don't carry a purse or work in a coal mine, there's still hope.

The inaccurately named "Electric Sand Timer" can be used in place of the traditional hourglass, programmable in increments of 1, 5 and 10 minutes, according to Newlaunches.

Why anyone would need one, of course, is anyone's guess. All we know is that, if a gadget has LEDs, someone will surely buy it.

(Credit: Elecom)

Some companies know how to put their R&D money to good use, actually coming up with some innovative and practical technologies. And then there's Elecom.

The Japanese company seems to have a knack for coming up with products of little practical value, such as mice that can be folded or used by the ambidextrous. Its latest offering proves true to form as well--a mouse that can be programmed for 31 functions.

Why would one possibly need a mouse to do so much? Elecom's wireless "Prumie" (nice name) does have a practical feature of stowing its USB dongle inside the mouse, according to Akihabara News, but we've been doing that with our Kensington model for several years.

If we were working at Elecom, we'd be nervous the next time the company decides to downsize.

(Credit: Red Ferret)

The people over at Eleksen are a sneaky lot. One can never tell when they'll have something new up their sleeves--literally.

The U.K. company specializes in "touch-sensitive interactive textiles," which translates to products such as the roll-up fabric keyboard we mentioned back in November. And now these magicians have surprised us again by flipping over that piece of digital cloth, revealing a second keyboard on the other side.

One surface of the double-sided USB fabric keyboard has a set of QWERTY keys for cell phones and other handheld devices, according to Red Ferret, while Side B has a calculator and media controls. Our take? We think Eleksen's R&D department has a bit too much time on its hands.

(Credit: Sci Fi Tech)

Good morning, Cravers. (Or good afternoon, or good evening. The Internet is a global phenomenon, after all.) I'm here to ask you all if anyone else has come to the same conclusion I have: that there has been a disturbing influx of color-changing devices that give off "a soft glow," or maybe "ambient light," or even a "Zen atmosphere." Anyone else notice that? These things are all over ThinkGeek, and now I'm seeing another variety (pictured) showcased on the Sci Fi Tech blog. Not to mention those penguins.

I trace this all back to the emergence of the Nabaztag bunny, as well as the sudden coolness of LED lighting as a feasible solution for large-scale indoor illumination. Yes, I know that part of being a gadget lover is the occasional irrational desire for something totally useless. But please, this is getting to be a little much.

Maybe it's just me. Maybe I'm the only one out there who's not a fan of cluttering up an already space-constrained desk, bedroom, or workspace; or of opting for expensive lighting solutions that probably will just make everything look weird and disco-ish anyway. Want Zen? Find some Gregorian chants on the iTunes Store, turn the darned lights off, and close your eyes.

That being said, have a lovely day, everyone.