Crave

Bacon bracelet: no natural additives

(Credit: Diffraction/Etsy)

Let me guess what you're thinking: "What the heckbeans is this doing on Crave? Where are the diodes, LCD screens, or batteries? Not even one Swarovski crystal?" Well, we realize this isn't tech-related, but considering the amount of bacon-related blog posts popping up on here, we doubt anyone will care.

Now I know I said before that men who wear jewelry should be stoned to death or something to that degree, but I think we can all agree that bacon is the crunchy, greasy, artery-clogging tie that binds us all together, so I'll make an exception for this bacon bracelet, courtesy of Diffraction's store on online crafts marketplace Etsy.com.

Anyway, the bracelet is a shiny silver and closes with a lobster clasp; it's also fully adjustable up to eight inches, but the seller can also make it larger if necessary. The "bacon" itself is professionally shot in a studio, printed on thick plastic, and then sealed with three coats of polyurethane for added durability. The result is a little slice of bacon that looks so similar to the real thing that you're likely to get a few strange looks in line at the bank, and maybe even one "Uhh, you gonna eat that?"

And now, for some bad news: unfortunately, the bracelet is sold out online right now, but check out the maker's Etsy store for future updates and other food-themed accoutrements. EDIT: The store has been updated, additional bacon bracelets available here!

More pictures of the bacon bracelet after the jump.

Good luck getting that rock into those tight jeans

(Credit: Sakurako Shimizu)

Men, look down at your fingers; if there's a ring on there, it best be either a wedding ring, a ring of power, or this super authentic 1981 ATARI chip replica, 'cause seriously, you've got no excuse for wearing any other jewelry on your digits.

Handmade by Sakurako Shimizu in Brooklyn, N.Y., the 18-karat gold ring you see above is crafted to look exactly like the original Atari computer chip. Talk about geek cred--who even remembers what those chips looked like?

No word yet on pricing, but keep checking Shimizu's blog and I'm sure she'll update it once it goes on sale.

Click through to see more pics of this ring. Hey, at least it's not a toe-ring.

(Credit: The Sound Advice Project)

The picture you see here is a bracelet modeled after the waveform of someone saying "I believe in you." Made by a group called The Sound Advice Project, it is a way for parents to record a message, which is then custom-made into a piece of jewelry as a gift to a teenage child. The purpose is for the child to always have a visual reminder of the advice.

Though primarily an effort against teen drug abuse (thus the focus on parent-child advice), the geeky-cool nature of this bracelet is undeniable. Check out the official site, where you can record a six-second message and buy your own waveform bracelet for $18.

(Source: Crave Asia via Boing Boing Gadgets)

(Credit: Honeyee)

In the time-tested tradition of bedazzling every article of clothing on your person, Audio-Technica has teamed up with Bless jewelers to bring you an exclusive line of headphones wrapped in uniquely gaudy decorative sleeves.

Now I can understand snazzing up your headphone cable with some beads or lace, but I struggle to think who would wear the one that looks like something you'd pick up off the floor of a Wookieean barber shop, especially considering that they cost 12,600 yen (or $129)!

Sounds nuts to me, but if you're truly desperate to show off your riches, you can buy a set of Bless/Audio-Technica's headphones here.

World's ugliest headphones

(Credit: Etsy)

In your face, iPhone! CrackBerry addicts now have a new way to show their loyalty to the smartphone--by dangling tiny versions from their ears.

And there's no need to fear added radiation from these BlackBerrys. The earrings, which measure about three-quarters of an inch high--are made from Fimo, a polymer clay. They were selling for $3 (plus shipping) on Etsy, an online market for homemade goods, but they're sold out now.

Maybe the upcoming release of Research In Motion's highly anticipated Bold will inspire the artist, whose Etsy handle is picnicbybarbfeldman, to pound out some more. She has been working with Fimo since 1971 and says she can make the earrings even tinier than the ones pictured--as studs about three-eighths of an inch wide and a half an inch high. Um, talk about BlackBerry thumb!

Thanks to Popgadget for ringing us up on this one.

(Credit: TFTS)

The designer jewelry trend of USB flash drives has been long documented in this space, from a $29,000 diamond pendant to a block of wood--including one from J. Lo. For the most part, however, these items are all meant to adorn the fairer sex. (We refuse to count those gold and diamond Swiss Army knives as anything masculine.)

So we were pleased to see this obvious disparity acknowledged by designers Tonia Welter and Julia Reyman, who have created a pair of USB cuff links. These limited-edition pieces of man jewelry come in 2GB storage sizes, though Coolest-Gadgets says that upgrades are available. There's only one problem: Other than a tuxedo shirt that no longer fits, we don't have any French cuffs.

(Credit: Adam&Eve)

For every yin there's a yang. Or something like that. All we know is that, just moments after gushing over the latest luxury MacBooks, we came across a design of another kind--and it's not a good thing. What's most disappointing about this "Adam&Eve" collection of fashion USB drives is that it comes from Gresso, a Russian company that we've followed for the last year because of its unique high-end designs in mobile phones and MP3 players.

Sadly, its USB "jewelry" doesn't compare to those beautiful items, even though the pendants are made with many of the same exterior materials, such as gold, diamonds and the company's signature African blackwood. In fact, they're reminiscent of a USB pendant made by Hong Kong-based Brando, the ultimate common-denominator manufacturer. Worse still, they top out at only 1GB of storage.

The USB jewelry business is a particularly tough gig to compete in, especially with such luxury goods peddlers as S.T. Dupont getting into the market with products costing thousands of dollars. Even so, Gresso made things even worse by stooping to using Swarovski crystals in its collection--a move that we see as the kiss of death.

(Credit: Yanko Design)

No, this isn't from today's Main Event. But as the Apple hype machine churns at full throttle before the opening act, it's only natural for people to dream.

To wit: The "iRing" is an ingenious concept that combines fashion jewelry and iPod control with built-in Bluetooth technology to adjust volume and playback. Following the iPhone's touch-screen influence, it has touch-sensitive "function strip" too--though we wonder how practical it is for a piece of hand jewlery to have that feature, as it would seem to get bumped around a bit and might accidentally blast your eardrums out of your skull.

But the cradle is a good idea to avoid losing it, which is bound to happen. And that would be disastrous, because we're certain that more than a few fan boys and girls would wear them as wedding rings.

(Credit: Amazon.com)

My, how times do change. Ten years ago, a respectable pirate wouldn't have been caught dead in a wristwatch adorned with a skull-and-crossbones made out of Swarovski crystals, even if he'd plundered it off the most bad-ass seagoing merchant in the West Indies. Sure, he could explain all he wanted that he'd had to use two rapiers, a cutlass, and a two-by-four to obtain it, and that the fight for the watch took place in a swamp filled with fifteen-foot-long alligators and a small but highly dangerous population of the elusive Puerto Rican Swamp Shark.

Yeah, it might be the spoils of battle, but it's still a sparkly watch with girly little jewels on it, Bluebeard.

Then along came Johnny Depp, who really did do wonders for the image of the prototypical pirate in his Captain Jack Sparrow get-up. Now, instead of needing to be head-to-toe greasy and smelling like maggot-ridden hardtack, pirates can be prettier than John Edwards. We're seeing lavish jewelry, runway-worthy ruffly shirts, and the heaviest eyeliner since the heyday of The Cure. (And it's proven influential, as evidenced by one guy at Crave who tends to take the "guyliner" a bit over the top.) Pirates can even be domestic--man, this sure is about a million nautical miles from the days of yore.

So you can be a legitimate pirate and wear your Vabene pirate watch with the utmost of pride. A veritable treasure chest's worth of variations is available, ranging from $250 to $295 in price. Our favorite, as shown, is naturally the pink one.

And if anybody takes offense, you've still got that cutlass.

(Via Uncrate)