Not on my head.
(Credit: Think Geek)The headline on this Dvice post about Think Geek's Wi-Fi-detecting hat says the cap will make you "king of the geeks." And maybe it will. But you can have that title, my liege; I'd rather get dates.
Not to say your crown isn't cool, technically it is. I mean, it has a fully functional Wi-Fi detector built in. So while you may never know if you've found decent coverage (unless you're staring into a mirror), at least all the girls around you will know. But since they won't be talking to you, it doesn't really matter.
OK, maybe I'm being a little hard on this thing, but again, I'm not cracking down on the hat, just on those who'd wear it around. It's really just a $14.99 way to advertise, "Look at me, I'm a geek! Ha! Look, geek here!" But if you're the type who'd wear this, I'm fairly sure the Utilikilt and BlackBerry holster would give it away anyway.
Adjust your hat with the Caps_Lock.
(Credit: Nobis)If you've ever worn a fitted hat, you know that they tend to shrink from your brow sweat after awhile, but who wants to wear a snap-backed cap or, even worse, a hat with one of those awful velcro straps? Nobody, but you still gotta maintain a good fit, and Nobis has your back with a Caps_Lock design that allows the wearer to adjust the size with a simple turn.
The real technology is in the built-in strap that comes with each hat. You can tighten or loosen your fit by adjusting the small dial on the side. Of course, you can only make minor adjustments, but it's perfect for windy days when you don't want your lid flying off into traffic.
Only a select number of Nobis' hats (with clever names like Al Kaholic and Mack Aroni) come equipped with its Caps_Lock technology, so check out the Nobis Web site before you buy.
(Via Wired Gadget Lab)
I arrrrrrrrrr cold!
(Credit: Mike Karikas)Some of you have beards. I know, I've seen them. Now, I know this isn't a gadget per se, but it's not fashion, either. It's got a function. You need to protect and care for your beards, lest you lose your Linux admin superpowers.
Meet Beard Head, the hat that gives you a warm layer of artsy hair to cover your face in the cold.
Anyone looks good in one, or at least hairier.
(Credit: Matt Hickey)My editor mentioned these to me and I jumped at the chance to write about them as my friend Michael Karikas just got a Beard Head and wore it out a couple nights ago. Being me, I had my camera and took photographs.
Michael actually wears it snowboarding, so his is for Serious Business, but anyone in a cold area could benefit from the warmth a beard and 'stache can provide. They come in four styles: Lumberjack (brown), Viking (yellow), Pirate (black), and Grandpa (gray), and only cost $24.99.
That may seem high to some of you, but having handled one of these things I can attest to how well-made they are. Not only that, but they're customizable. For $4.99 more, you can make the 'stache a fu manchu-style, with more styles coming soon. I'm looking forward to the Mario version.
Solar radio visor
(Credit: Gearfuse)
Solar fan hat
Finally, the solar-powered fan hat has a mate. Let's have a round of applause for the "Solar-Powered Visor Radio."
Like its counterpart, this is a functional piece of headgear that makes use of the sun's rays to impress your friends, but for entertainment purposes as well as protection from melanoma and heat stroke. The visor has a speaker on each side, Gearfuse says, piping in tunes from a built-in AM/FM tuner.
It just goes to show that being green is no guarantee of immunity from the dreaded Date Repellant Syndrome.
(Credit:
Crave Asia)
Great balls of subversion! This is just too weird not to mention. If there's anyone brave enough to strut around in this bizarre headgear, we salute you. However, we'd suggest adding another $250 for the snap-on leather goggles to make this a full-faced mask--that way, your neighbors and employers can't make out that it's you under all the leather dreads and rivets.
Oakley's Medusa Hat sans eyewear costs $500 apiece, according to Uncrate, and doesn't even feature any MP3 options, unlike the Thumps. So whatever it is, its demand is probably limited to the post-apocalyptic crowd.
(Source: Crave Asia)
If only the Internet had been around to comfort Rear Window's Miss Lonelyhearts back in 1954.
A new poll shows that nearly 1 in 4 Americans say the Internet could be a stand-in for a significant other for a period of time. Among singles, the percentage was even higher: 31 percent. (One wonders how popular such responses as "reading a good book" or "playing with my cats" were to the question of substitutes.)
The poll examined people's attitudes about the Internet. Results of the online survey, conducted by Zogby International and 463 Communications, were released Wednesday.
The survey also found that there are people willing to have a device implanted in their brain--safely, of course--so they'd have ready access to the Internet. About 11 percent of respondents said so. But more men (17 percent) than women (7 percent) did. (Just think, you could impress many a date and your trivia team would win every week. Although when the suitably impressed person becomes a steady thing, the Internet might get jealous.)
Other tidbits from the results:
• To help keep track of children's whereabouts, nearly 1 in 5 respondents said they would be willing to have a chip implanted in a child 13 or younger.
• Among the 18- to 24-year-old set, 78 percent said they have a social-networking profile. More Democrats (32 percent) than Republicans (22 percent) said they have a presence on a social-networking site.
• When it comes to spirituality, 10 percent said the Internet made them closer to God, but 6 percent said it made them more distant.
• The self-esteem of Hollywood hotties is safe for now. Halle Berry, Scarlett Johansson and Patrick Dempsey are considered sexier than the iPhone, according to the poll. Respondents were asked who or what was sexier. Berry came in at 27 percent, Johansson had 17 percent and Dempsey got 14 percent. The iPhone tied with Derek Jeter at 6 percent. It doesn't appear that respondents were asked whether owning an iPhone--or simply wearing the iPhone hat--increases one's appeal. (This is just a guess: the people who consider the iPhone sexier than any of the people above probably believe that the Internet could be a substitute for a partner.)
The survey, conducted October 4 through 8, tallied the responses of 9,743 adults across the country. It has a margin of error plus or minus 1 percentage point.
(via Reuters)I'm lusting after a material thing, and I'm a bit ashamed.
Still, this is just about the coolest hat I've ever seen: A top hat with a built-in set of LEDs (seen here from the artist's YouTube video) that plays sequenced animations, including images from Space Invaders and Pac-Man. It also displays bouncing hearts, the alphabet and all kinds of other images.
A YouTube video showcases a top hat featuring sequenced LEDs that play animations from 'Space Invaders' and 'Pac-Man', among others.
(Credit: YouTube user fyfyt)I'm not sure how comfortable this hat would be, but hey, who cares? You can walk around with wonderful animations scrolling on your head, and that obviates simple comfort.
This reminds me of things I've seen at Burning Man, like Mark Lottor's Big Round Cubatron, a huge sculpture that plays beautiful sequenced animations on thousands of LED-filled ping-pong balls strung out from a center pole.
But this, you wear it on your head and can bring it around with you. Now, all I need is some electrical engineering skills, so that I can build one myself.
(Credit:
S&F Products)
Wow. This one ranks right up there with the "Light Head Magnifer." If you thought the iPod hat cited yesterday was dorkworthy, you'll probably want to avert your eyes from the "BrimLight."
As its name indicates, this battery of five LEDs attaches to the brim of your hat, according to Book of Joe, lighting a 120-degree radius with a range of up to 30 feet. Those stats may be impressive, if you're really into lights, but they come at a rather brutal price of fashion victimization.
If you really need a coal miner's light for your golf hat, you might want to look into the "Lite and Motion Head Lite Cap." At least that chapeau won't make your head look like a highway construction sign.
(Credit:
iXoundWear)
Silly us. It had been awhile since we'd seen an example of the ridiculous headgear flooding the market, so we naively thought companies had come to their senses and stopped making the ludicrous devices.
Then, of course, along comes something like "iXoundWear" to bring us back to reality. Although not quite as doofus-looking as the "iWalk," the iXoundWear line nonetheless is full of effective date-repelling products. And they can keep you free on Saturday nights all year 'round, because they come in styles that range from apparel appropriate for summertime (visors) through winter (knit caps), according to Cool Gadgets Zone.
All come in around $20, which means you can still save up for a solar fan hat or, if it's a really special occasion, a "Head Spa Massager."
(Credit:
Home Trends)
Wow. It's not often that we're left speechless by the sheer dorkiness of an item, but this one almost had that effect on us.
The very name of the "Lighted Head Magnifier" screams date-repellant, but it still can't come close to conveying the image in the photo shown here. In case anyone cares, Coolest-Gadgets says this piece of headgear provides 3.5x magnification, a spare light bulb and "non-slip fit." That may be so, but it still looks like a poor man's combination of a "Shade Blade" and an LED baseball cap, with the aesthetics of a solar-powered fan hat thrown in for good measure.
On the positive side, it could be the perfect accessory to wear while watching favorite episodes of the original Star Trek--again--on Saturday night.
