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October 2, 2009 5:01 PM PDT

Introducing the bra that is meant to be taken off

by Elizabeth Armstrong Moore
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The gas mask bra is one of the winners at the 19th First Annual Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony.

(Credit: Elena Bodnar)

This week the Annals of Improbable Research hosted its 19th First Annual Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony. As CNET News' Elinor Mills wrote, this year was no less ignoble than the previous 18, with such delightful discoveries as applications for panda poo and observations from a lifetime of knuckle cracking.

Except for one award: the gas mask bra, which, while ridiculous and hilarious at face value, has far more going on below the, er, neckline.

Elena Bodnar, who lives in Chicago, got her start as a scientist in Ukraine, when she witnessed the devastating effects of the Chernobyl nuclear plant disaster in 1986. She noticed, among other things, that women were wearing bras that may have been lacy but were certainly not life-saving.

At the ceremony, Bodnar demonstrated her invention, which she said could have prevented people from breathing in Iodine-131 in the wake of Chernobyl. She graciously gave pink bras (each of which can turn into two gas masks) to actual Nobel laureates (yes, even the men, who now have the option to enjoy the bras without shame--not to mention any likely real effect--in the privacy of their own homes).

The bra's patent abstract, which also includes an attempt to make "positionable" a word, somehow manages to be as boring as other patent abstracts:

A bra garment comprising: a plurality of detachable cup sections, each of the cup sections having: (a) a filter device; (b) a first portion positionable adjacent to a first central area of a user's chest; (c) a second portion positionable adjacent to a second outer area of the user's chest adjacent to an underarm; and (d) a valve device.

And for all the women out there who are worried about whether their cup size is too big or small to turn into effective gas masks: size, according to Bodnar, doesn't matter.

Elizabeth Armstrong Moore is a freelance journalist based in Portland, Ore. She has contributed to Wired magazine, The Christian Science Monitor, and public radio. Her semi-obscure hobbies include unicycling, slacklining, hula-hooping, scuba diving, billiards, Sudoku, Magic the Gathering, and classical piano. She is a member of the CNET Blog Network and is not an employee of CNET.
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Add a Comment (Log in or register) Showing 1 of 2 pages (57 Comments)
by peramica October 2, 2009 5:32 PM PDT
So, where's the gas mask/cup for the other half of the world?
Reply to this comment
by October 2, 2009 6:35 PM PDT
in the girl's bra! it said it makes 2 gas masks :D
by wakkome October 2, 2009 7:45 PM PDT
You must have seen a man wearing Fruit of the Looms on his head somewhere, sometime in your life.
by Seaspray0 October 3, 2009 7:22 AM PDT
Next up, the jock strap that turns into a gas mask.... uhhh, no thanks.
by VoiceOfLogic October 5, 2009 4:25 PM PDT
@peramica: have you been asleep these past 15-20 years? What with all of the anti male, destroy the man, make the guy look like a jackass TV sitcoms, OH and the commercials GALORE where the guy cant even dial a telephone properly -- does this come as as surprise?
by cvaldes1831 October 2, 2009 5:33 PM PDT
Without a doubt, the most titillating Cnet article I have read for a while. Thank you!
Reply to this comment
by zgreenwell October 6, 2009 9:00 AM PDT
You should check out some of Gawker's sites.
by rcardona2k October 2, 2009 5:46 PM PDT
The prayers of millions of high school boys have been answered!
Reply to this comment
by dhavleak October 2, 2009 6:41 PM PDT
Not until there's a chemical spill or something nearby -- *then* they'll be grinning from ear to ear :)
by drgiraldo October 2, 2009 6:37 PM PDT
It is a breast taking story
Reply to this comment
by karpenterskids October 2, 2009 9:37 PM PDT
haha
by faceless128 October 3, 2009 12:07 AM PDT
indeed, cnet is doing a great service by keeping us abreast of this situation.
by roshanmani October 3, 2009 3:53 AM PDT
Talk about 'support' in gas-leak times.. And Cnet's got a comment about this being 'hilarious at face value'.. LOL.
by sundance808 October 4, 2009 6:07 PM PDT
yep you just nipped it!
by lightningrob October 2, 2009 6:48 PM PDT
I'm curious to see how this invention fills out in the market...
Reply to this comment
by SpeedPsycho October 7, 2009 5:05 PM PDT
"size, according to Bodnar, doesn't matter."<br /><br />it will have appeal to audiences large and small.
by kucingliar October 2, 2009 7:09 PM PDT
Mmm. turning bra into emergency gas mask for two. And then to whom the spared bra goes to, mmm. I really can described that in word :D
Reply to this comment
by Vegaman_Dan October 2, 2009 7:09 PM PDT
I busted out laughing at the story, curious how long CNET has been waiting to get this off their chest
Reply to this comment
by Name1esswonder October 3, 2009 1:36 PM PDT
Heh, Off their chest...
by iamrta October 2, 2009 7:11 PM PDT
This story is mounds of fun
Reply to this comment
by jhoff80 October 2, 2009 7:18 PM PDT
Is this really the kind of society we live in now where it seems reasonable for someone to be paranoid enough to want a gas mask with them at all times?
Reply to this comment
by sailinganfd October 2, 2009 7:23 PM PDT
yes
by Rants&Raves October 2, 2009 10:47 PM PDT
Hey hon, nice rack. But: what's in it for me ?
by MavMin October 3, 2009 4:54 PM PDT
Without a doubt. If you don't have a readiness kit you are palying Russian roulette. <br /> <br />http://www.orgsites.com/tx/tcd/
by jz33040 October 2, 2009 7:24 PM PDT
Saw them at Home Depot today on sale for $19.99.
Reply to this comment
by cshimmin October 2, 2009 7:29 PM PDT
Google search "define: positionable":<br />If it's good enough for Princeton, it's good enough for the ignobles.
Reply to this comment
by ZetaZeta_ October 2, 2009 9:28 PM PDT
Seriously, I had no idea what she was going on about with /positionable/.<br />There are stranger words. This one's not even that strange, and it's like a third the content of her article. :x
by obrie021 October 2, 2009 7:43 PM PDT
can it double as a yarmulke with chin strap?
Reply to this comment
by msowajr October 2, 2009 7:45 PM PDT
Sorry folks but the 3M company invented the Bra/Dust mask over 30 years ago and came up with many variations to fit the situation of the moment. this writer has not done her research as also the ?Noble? org.
Reply to this comment
by littleM October 2, 2009 9:30 PM PDT
Yeah, but back then they burned them all.
by fourthletter October 2, 2009 8:16 PM PDT
So far there has been 1 Chernobyl nuclear plant disaster.<br />Are all women who live near a nuclear power plant expected to only buy bras that also double as gas masks ? then in the event of an accident take their bras off and hand them out ?<br />I feel this idea should have been left in Art school LOL
Reply to this comment
by gdod25 October 3, 2009 12:42 PM PDT
Three Mile Island. How soon the public forgets.
by Brittni1 October 7, 2009 9:53 AM PDT
No comparison between Chernobly and Three Mile Island.
by koolbass October 3, 2009 3:40 AM PDT
Makes me wanna find someone with whom to practice a fire-drill %^)
Reply to this comment
by pugster October 3, 2009 5:50 AM PDT
Now people with fetishes of sniffing women's bras have an excuse.
Reply to this comment
by skillydog October 3, 2009 6:22 AM PDT
I'd feel like a real boob if I was caught in a disaster without one of theses. Of course, one problem with them is, what woman will want to get undressed during a disaster, especially if it is cold and nippy outside. I mean, people might just bust out laughing.
Reply to this comment
by moonp1e October 3, 2009 3:38 PM PDT
Get undressed? 99% of women can take off their bra w/o taking off their shirt. Men haven't realized this yet because they're still trying to master unhooking the back.
by fishnetgear October 3, 2009 7:20 AM PDT
No woman in the entire future of the world will ever save 2 men at the detriment of herself, let alone help any man with selfless consideration of herself. The best this invention will accomplish is more people grasping at her breasts.
Reply to this comment
by TargetDriver October 3, 2009 10:22 AM PDT
Oddly enough, the inspiration for the Moldex(R) dust mask was the bra. It seems that the cup stiffeners were worn by bra assembly workers to avoid the dust during manufacturing. I confirmed this with my local Moldex sales rep.<br /><br />I wonder where the NIOSH label(s) will be attached.
Reply to this comment
by mudauber October 3, 2009 2:41 PM PDT
In WW1 gas masks had to be urinated on to work effectively, so this could be worse;)
Reply to this comment
Showing 1 of 2 pages (57 Comments)
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