To: Fox Home Entertainment
From: Caroline McCarthy, Crave
Re: What's with the Blu-rays?
Fox, you have been all too generous. I'm not a movie critic. I'm not a DVD reviewer. I'm not even employed as a reviewer here at CNET. But it's always a pleasant surprise when a package arrives from you guys every few weeks and there's a complimentary Blu-ray Disc inside. Today, it was an especially nice surprise when Eragon showed up in my mailbox. (I'm a "so bad it's good" fan.)
But here's my dilemma. I don't have a Blu-ray player! Heck, I'm not even sure I have a regular DVD player anymore since that little "blueberry Jell-O incident." (Long story.) And I don't know anybody who has a PS3, either. I guess I could convince our TV reviewers to let me watch these Blu-rays on one of the players they probably have on hand, but then I'd have to bribe them with free candy, and I gave away my last bag of fun size chocolate bars in an attempt to convince Dave Katzmaier to lend me his camcorder after mine decided to stop working. (Oops!)
So, Fox, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very grateful for your generosity. I only wish I could actually do something with these Blu-rays.
DISCLAIMER: This post is a joke. Caroline did not actually ruin her DVD player with blueberry Jell-O, nor do CNET's reviewers demand candy in order to let their lowly News.com brethren into the TV testing room. She could give them a million bucks and they still wouldn't let her set foot in their "secret clubhouse."