'Phaser' remote for lonely Saturday nights

(Credit: Phone Phun Novelty Telephones)

Apparently, attraction to the opposite sex isn't nearly as important as it used to be. That's the only explanation we can fathom for the continuing trend of new Star Trek items on the market.

The latest date repellant is a $70 "Phaser Universal Remote Control," which claims to feature sound effects from the original series provided by Paramount. Alas, Red Ferret notes that it's already sold out. (What a surprise.)

But don't despair, Sparky. If you play your cards right, you might still be able to score a "Lightsaber Umbrella."

[make_or_break]

HEY...even Trekkies need their consumer fix.

Be kind, Mike. Be VERY kind. You never know when you yourself will be transported to some other time and space (usually that's a sign of old age. Or dementia.). Reliving Pokeman...or Power Rangers...now THAT'S a nightmare.

Besides, considering some of the content that's available on TV, the ability to 'ray gun' the boob tube, even symbolically, seems wholly appropriate.