Forget what I told you before about disguising your iPhone; there are alternatives to feeling embarrassed by your mobile phone. Why not buy one that you can be proud of, maybe even one forged from the ashes of Miss Mother Nature herself? Set yourself up with an iWood 3B smartphone and you'll never again miss "all the times you wood rather stab someone in the eye than talk about 3G anything."
The iWood 3B is the perfect complement for the on-the-go professional who knows when it's time to work, when it's time to play, and when it's time to tap on a 3-inch by 4-1/2 half inch piece of Bamboo Plywood. Amazingly, the entire device is crafted from a single block of wood, and it's contoured at a precise 90-degree angle to fit ergonomically in your hand.
Like its current competition, it has all the internal components you now expect out of a full-time device: accelerometer, proximity/light/infrared sensor, and even its own sensor for sensing sensors around your sector. Best of all, the iWood 3B draws all of its power from a rechargeable gyroscopic battery that should last for approximately infinity hours with just one twitch.
What all-in-one (AIO) would be prepared for the masses without its own set of unique applications? Aside from the standard to-do list, calendar, MP3 player, and Web, the iWood also offers its own line of real-world apps that run autonomously off the OS.
Our favorite to use around the CNET Labs is the "Know It All" application, which forces the user to physically seek out and memorize actual facts instead of simply regurgitating words off a Google search. It's actually very handy for when I foolishly forget to graft my iPhone into my hand before leaving the house. I also like the phone's impressive push-to-talk application that encourages the user to practice onomatopoeia and jazz scat singing to imitate the sounds of an authentic phone dialer.
If you're not running to throw your phone in the garbage disposal by now, I recommend clicking on the slideshow down there and checking out the comprehensive iWood Web site. It's a great resource for all things 3B,with detailed descriptions of all the compatible applications, system and operation requirements, and even a user-submitted gallery of the iWood in iPublic.
After you're done with that, pick up an iWood 3B from the store. One more point for the iWood: it's 20 times cheaper than the iPhone--SOLD.