Between Vegas and L.A., there are aliens.
Please, don't just take my word for it (though anyone who's taken that drive should know what strange occurrences might await).
Instead, hark at NBA star Baron Davis, who seems to have little doubt that beings from out there invaded his space down here, as he journeyed back from the City of Sin to the City of Spin.
In a pulsating interview with "The Champs" podcast (warning: he uses naughty words here), the former Golden State Warrior (currently teamless) insists that one minute he was driving and the next he was "in this, like, steel thing."
There were "crazy-looking people, half-human, half, like [imagine aforementioned naughty words here]."
He claims they were poking him on his nose and looking him in the eyes.
To some, this might seem entirely like the usual form of defense enacted by Metta World Peace.
Still, Davis insists they then tied his hands.
More Technically Incorrect
But just when he must have imagined that he would soon be on the Planet Zarp playing point guard for the Capital City Zarpshooters, he regained an earthly consciousness and discovered he was in Montebello, Calif., still without an NBA team.
He claims he was shaking and, given that it was 4 a.m., his only recourse was to find sustenance -- yes, at an In-N-Out Burger.
This all allegedly occurred a mere two weeks ago.
Some might imagine that Davis was imagining things. He has been known to be involved in the movie business.
He concedes right at the end of the interview that it might have been the Illuminati.
But he claims that, after this experience, he is now mentally sharper. He claims he is retaining more information.
Of course, it's frustrating that he's unable to retain information about what these beings looked like or whether they spoke at all.
Davis should subject himself immediately to hypnosis and examination by the government's finest scientists.
The future of the world (and of alien movies) might depend on it.