Sometimes you just have to let go.
It may well be that your ex didn't appreciate the glory that is you. It may well be that your former lover is, at heart, a sinking vessel of self-loathing and delusion.
But it really isn't worth setting up a fake Facebook account, then posting nasty messages on your real Facebook account from your fake Facebook account, then accusing your ex's lover of being the poster.
I mention this merely because that is the strategy of which Cheryl Nelson of Grand Rapids, Mich., stands accused.
As Michigan's MLive reports, the alleged fake Facebook account was set up using the personal details of Nelson's ex-boyfriend, Kevin Haarsma.
Messages of a threatening nature were allegedly posted from it, purportedly from his new lover.
Police say that the next step in the scheme was that Nelson reported these messages (and other supposed letters pinned to her door) to the police.
However, the forces of the law don't buckle under mere impressions. They obtained a warrant in order to examine Nelson's computer equipment. This allegedly revealed that the threatening messages had actually been posted from there.
More Technically Incorrect
As Kent County Sheriff's Detective Jason Russo told MLive: "Evidence shows that Nelson used her computer to set up false Facebook accounts using Kevin Haarsma's personal information. Nelson used this account to make it appear that she was being stalked and harassed by Kevin's new girlfriend by posting threatening messages."
Russo also claimed Nelson confessed that she was moved to these actions because she couldn't give up her relationship with Haarsma.
Trying to crawl after an ex-lover rarely works. It merely makes them feel good about their new situation. It merely makes them feel like they can have you back at a moment's notice. Or even in the time it takes to compose a Facebook message.
Love isn't a thing of charm and beauty. It's a competition.
Now the distraught Nelson is charged with falsely reporting a felony and unlawfully posting a message.
How things might have been different if, instead of posting these alleged threats, she had posted pictures of herself with a younger, more gorgeous, more successful man on a glorious beach.
Ex-lovers are notoriously jealous, you see.