Virgin turns down $1 million for galactic porn movie

These days it's hard for a porn producer to find new ways to go where no man (or woman or beast) has gone before.

So it is perhaps unsurprising that Virgin Galactic, the company that plans to fly passengers into orbit from late 2009, announced that it has received a $1 million offer to allow a porn movie to be shot on one of its spacecraft, an offer the company has declined.

As I understand it, the producers thought they would be able to find a completely different kind of action if the participants were under the influence of zero gravity.

It is, however, difficult to understand how they thought they might be able to shoot such a movie.

Virgin Galactic's Richard Branson acknowledges the pleasures of the service.

(Credit: CC Tanya Ryno)

Virgin Galactic's proposed flights offer, for a return ticket of $200,000, only a five-minute period of weightlessness.

However, those who involve themselves in the pleasures of pornography explain to me that the copulatory scenes tend to last a little longer than your average real-life five minutes. And sometimes they involve multiple physically demanding entanglements.

I am, therefore, unclear as to whether the producers (who remain strangely unnamed) wanted to rent the spacecraft solely for their own purposes or whether they were merely looking to book seats for the performers and a single member camera crew.

If it were the former, then surely the $1million offer has something of a derisory nature.

If it were the latter, might Virgin Galactic have charged the other passengers a little extra, given that they would be in the presence of an entirely otherworldly transport that would truly make the trip a once-in-a-lifetime experience?

One's mind is also somewhat disturbed by whether sex in space really is such an easy pleasure. Would there not be a problem with synchronization?

Still, Virgin's extraordinary and surprising intransigence on this alluring space sexperiment means that those who have had to tolerate suboptimal sex for so many years will also have to do without suborbital sex for a while longer.

We really are living in very difficult times.

[Michichael]

I believe NASA already did experiments on this kinda stuff. You'd need a special elastic band to make it work and even then it wasn't very... fun. I forget where I read it though.

[ChrisMatyszczyk]

A special elastic bad? Eek. That just sounds so fabulously dreadful.

I can imagine that must have upset you...

Chris

[Ghostdog2]

There was actually a zero gravity porn movie shot a long time ago called 'The Uranus Experiment', it wasn't in space but in one of those planes where you can experience zero gravity. Here's an article about it:

http://www.space.com/sciencefiction/movies/uranus_experiment_000516.html

[ChrisMatyszczyk]

Now how come you knew about that Ghostdog2? Huh? Did you actually watch it?

Chris

[Solaris_User]

Virgin is only delaying the inevitable.. some day we will have space porn.

[Lerianis]

I'm sorta surprised that we DON'T have porn in a place that looks like the international space station. I could have sworn that I saw an amateur production on one of the streaming porn sites that was in this genre.

[doconn7]

If it takes porn to make space travel happen for the rest of us, why not?
After all isn't that where all the money is? Come on! Flying around in a giant phallic symbol with Virgin stamped on its back and a pin up painted on the front! Tell me that's not indecent. . .

[Swooley]

This would be great for Virgin. Not only would they get publicity, but look at their name, "Virgin," no one could ever forget them. Besides porn is the reason why normal people began to use the internet. I feel this could be the same concept, the catalyst for commercial space travel.

[ChrisMatyszczyk]

Hah. Brilliant logic, Swooley. You could be right.

Chris

[Rick Cavaretti]

Still, Virgin's extraordinary and surprising intransigence on this alluring space sexperiment means that those who have had to tolerate suboptimal sex for so many years will have to also have to do without suborbital sex for a while longer.

That line busts me up. Well done.

[ChrisMatyszczyk]

Rick,

You are more than kind. Thank you.

Chris

[BenFlavoredCandy]

Reminds me of an episode of Futurama where Scruffy, the janitor, is reading a magazine called "Zero G Jugs".

As fun as that film may be, $1 mil. is too low. And certainly pornography is a) not 'publicity' for a huge corporation like Virgin, and b) definitely not what they would be remembered for, what with hundreds of pop artists on the Virgin label.

[ChrisMatyszczyk]

Now why would you have remembered that particular scene, Ben?

Chris