Ten ways to break your laptop

It's a well-known fact that circuit boards and liquids don't mix, but there are more bizarre ways to break your laptop. A Massachusetts-based computer repair company has listed the top 10 ways that people deep-six their laptops--MacBooks, in particular.

Is your MacBook an accident waiting to happen?

(Credit: Apple)

In many respects, a laptop is an accident waiting to happen. Often there is no more than a thin piece of plastic between the user and disaster. And Apple MacBooks are particularly vulnerable at Starbucks these days due to their increasing popularity over the standard-fare Dell laptop.

But spilling coffee on your keyboard is one of the less colorful ways to break your laptop (Apple MacBook Air owners take note: No. 7).

Computer repair company MicroReplay, which specializes in repairing Apple computers, listed the top 10 ways that consumers kill their laptops.

The List:

10. Sorry, honey, I punched the laptop: "Striking a laptop computer with a fist, even while (the laptop is) closed, will jostle the logic board and stop the computer," said Joseph Kouyoumjian, president and founder of MicroReplay. Estimated repair cost: $1,000.

9. Facebook freakout: A teenage girl discovers a picture of her boyfriend kissing another girl becomes outraged and flings her MacBook off the desk, sending it crashing onto the hardwood floor. Estimated repair cost: $475.

8. Cockpit crusher: The pilot of a commercial Airbus A320 moves his seat forward while the laptop is on the floor, crushing the case and breaking the logic board. Estimated repair cost: $800.

7. Temper Toss (a subset of the "Facebook freakout"): Thrown objects can easily break a laptop's screen. "If you receive bad news on your BlackBerry, resist the temptation to throw near your open Apple MacBook Air." Estimated repair cost: $500.

6. Hurling. "If you puke on your laptop, don't even tell the laptop computer repair company what the liquid is," notes Kouyoumjian. "If we know it's bodily fluid, we don't want it." Estimated repair cost: Fix it yourself, please.

5. Passing out drunk on your Dell laptop: Your sleeping bodyweight can bend the case, and may also ruin the screen. Estimated repair cost: $325--$500.

4. MacBook laptop as foot stool, or scale: No Laptop computer is designed to support your weight, so stepping on your laptop will almost certainly break it. Repair cost: Depends on how much you weigh....

3. Ear buds as laptop or notebook computer terrorist: "Closing your laptop with your ear buds inside will crack the screen," according to Kouyoumjian. "This kind of laptop computer repair is growing with alarming speed. It seems we love our ear buds, yet forget that they are not made of cushy foam. We see a lot of cracked screens as a result." Estimated repair cost: $440.

2. Your 5-year-old discovers gravity! Any time you drop your laptop from more than 2 feet, it can shake loose a chip or board, and break the machine. Estimated repair cost: $300.

1. Starbucks hates your keyboard: "Liquid spills on a laptop's keyboard short them out every time. Maybe it's the caffeine that makes us jittery, but so many laptops are killed by coffee there should be a warning on the paper cup." Estimated repair cost: $350 to $500, depending on the amount of time the computer was left running after the spill.

[ti99_forever]

yes, they should print a warning on the bottom of the coffee cups! ;)

[JavaMan09]

Don't worry, somebody will sue, and it will happen.

[JessicaInPink]

This is the dumbest article that I have ever read. Should have been called, "Ten Ways to Write a Stupid, Dumb Article That Makes No Sense and Just Pisses Off Loyal Readers."

[Hunnter2k3]

If anything, laptops should always come with a button that instantly turns them off, none of this bull "hold for a few seconds" crap or being forced to pull the battery in some cases.

I'll never get a laptop unless i can turn it off instantly.
The only one that deviated from this slightly was that there was 2 things that was required, press the power and slide a switch, instant off.

[Firehazel]

@Hunter
you can set up on Windows as to when you press power, it does cut off.

[alegr]

@Hunter, firehazel,

The "soft" (graceful) shutdown or hibernation is triggered by a short push on the button. Assuming your OS supports that. The "2 seconds" is a hard shutdown which just shuts off the power, at a risk of corrupting the filesystem and losing data in the file caches.

[rayzoredge]

So basically, the #1 killer of laptops would be stupidity, followed by heat.

[jaguar717]

The "top 10" turned out to be basically two: hit or drop your laptop, or get it wet.

I never would've guessed.

[Renegade Knight]

#1 Killer of laptops is crappy quality coming from the OEM. At least in my household.

[Dalkorian]

Rayzoredge, I missed the one that mentioned heat.
;-)

[loki_racer]

What's a logic board?

[pithenumber]

apple for mobo

[jaguar717]

Think of it as the iMotherboard. Like a regular one, but more "logical" and painted white (hence the upcharge).

[Chapmaniac]

You forgot to add "It's just like a regular motherboard only 3 times the price."

[pithenumber]

@jaguar and chap
stop trolling
btw, last time i checkd, Apple mobos are just like normal mobos and cost the same as a normal mobo, Apple just likes profit

[celticbrewer]

#10, #8. Why the $200 difference to replace the MoBo in 2 different scenerios. They even mention repairing the case on the cheaper quote.

800 to 1,000. Wow, pithenumber, you're right. Profit!

[loki_racer]

Well, why didn't you say iMotherboard in the first place. Geez, of course I know what that is.

[bschmock]

I've spilled coffee on my laptop before...didn't do a thing. However I also spilled a rum and coke on one of them and that ruined the keyboard and the internal wireless and the PCMCIA port. Maybe the coffee was just luck I dunno but it seems to me (and ive had much experience with cell phones) that liquor kills electronics like no other liquid can.

[nathan309]

my brother dropped his samsung phone into a pint of lager.

Pulled it out, left it to dry, and hey presto good as new.

No effect what so ever except for a strange smell.

[Renegade Knight]

Had s soda spill. Got some sticky keys out of it. Annoying but functional. Later when the Video went out Dell refused to honor the warrany due to the spill and asked me to pay 550 for the repair. I asked to confirm the spill caused the problems and if they did I'd pay. They sent back the laptop instead. I paid a local shop to determin what the spill impacted. It only hit the keyboard and the keyboard was working fine (other than sticky which we were working on). By Dell's logic the non problem with the keyboard caused a systemwide failure leading to the video failure.

[Pishkado]

The biggest single cause of problems is gravity: applied to the laptop, or applied to something above the laptop. Avoid gravity, and you're all set (except for the throwing, punching and crushing bits).

[Dalkorian]

There is no gravity. Everything sucks.
:-D

[ballmerisanape]

Dried snot and nose hair in the keyboard can be problematic too.

[inachu1]

Should also add:
People who suffocate their laptop by having it sit on carpet or on their bed reducing airflow greating which in turns makes everything inside super heated and kills the hard drive and video card and cpu.

[Goodbye Helicopter]

yep, they're dumdums

[Mark Holloway]

You should order a frozen coffee, At least you have some time before it melts.

[bugma302]

I sneezed on my Dell laptop which stopped the number 3 from functioning.

My wife dropped her Iphone in a glass of wine (not easy, just you try it) resulting in arguments, seperate rooms and a long icy silence.

[Mark Holloway]

Biggest mistake I have seen and I have seen it very often is people at Cyber cafes sitting outside on the Padio in the hot summer working on their laptops.
They do not realize heat will destroy a computer or at least shorten the life of it.

[Goodbye Helicopter]

nonsense.
The CPU and HDD and ODD all get that hot regularly if you do any thing intense with the thing.

[i-arman]

Summer heat isn't going to do as much damage as setting it on carpet or a pillow. As long as ambient temperature is below 100 degrees or so, it'll be fine. Resting temp is usually around 120 degrees F. A laptop running hard can get up to 150-200 degrees.

What's bad is if there's humidity... I shudder to think of bringing a computer out from a cool bookstore to a hot, humid day... even a little bit of condensation will kill it dead.

[CNETBrianD]

yeah a computer running at even 60C or 80C won't kill it, though 30-40 is more normal. And for people more than 35 is quite uncomfortable!

[a3th3r]

What many people fail to realize is that a small increase in ambient temperature will slow the rate at which heat dissapates from the system. As time goes on the system will continue to heat in the case to rise significantly above normal operating temperature. I could not say with any type of certain what an unsafe ambient temperature would be, but in the right circumstances an increase in ambient temp of 5 degrees could easily cause a 20+ degree increase in internal temperature.

[Goodbye Helicopter]

Best one I ever heard of... girl has macbook, some drunk guy in dorm peed on macbook (it was open and on...?)....

[Charleston Charge]

We once had a user run over their laptop with their car. Apparently they were putting stuff in their trunk and forgot the laptop bag on the ground and then backed up right over it. Surprisingly enough it still booted although the body was bent and the screen was cracked.

[Magallanes]

Removing the memory of your notebook and leaving only 512mb of ram (of less) then install vista.

Also

Installing vista in the notebook of a linux fanboys.

[sythara]

rofl. yeah that will definately cause #6

[FMsongwriter]

I killed my work computer by spilling coffee on it and destroyed my own MacBook Pro screen by closing it on my iPod's earbuds. Apparently, I'm not special, just a clutz like everyone else.

[pjackson_dotmac]

I've got another 1. Had my upgraded Mac Book Pro run over in the parking lot in the bag.
http://web.me.com/pjackson/Site/Crushed_MBP.html

[darkebinary]

The biggest killer of laptops where I work is people leaving them on top of their car and driving off. That also applies to cell phones.

[CNETBrianD]

so is putting them UNDER the car tires and speeding off at 100km/hr +! i've done it with other electronics before.

[pithenumber]

the biggest killer of laptops is stupidity

[Dalkorian]

I'd correct that to read the biggest killer of electronics is stupidity. Remember how the Wiimote had that defect that caused your 50" plasma TV to shatter?

[sodapop2k9]

I can't believe I read the whole article. I hope you didn't torture a tree by writing a draft on paper.

[inachu1]

In a fit of anger a sysadmin of the old EROLS internet service one day just walked by the server and yanked the memory out of it while it was on. Back then EROLS dialup servers were sitting on 2X4's not inside cases with desk fans blowing on them.

[hawkeyeaz1]

Honestly, liquid spills are not that bad. I have had 2 laptops (still have, actually), one I spilled ramen nodle juice in, as well as soda, and the other I spilled a little bit of soda, as well as my then 7 month old daughter spitting up on the keyboard. The worst result aside from sticky keys was the area where my daughter spit up (by the fn key) causing me to not be able to use the letters that doubled as function keys. Simply opening up the keyboard and cleaning it well resolved the issue. Both laptops work without issues.

But then again, I am a bit techier than most. And those 4 instances were over 6 years, with heavy use.

Even direct water damage to an unexposed motherboard (admittedly, a desktop one) is not that big of an issue, just a fair bit of careful scraping. The PC recovered from the trash with said damage works fine.

[viper396]

Consider yourself lucky, nothing more. Let's not imply that all "liquid spills are not that bad" and everyone will have the same experience. A liquid spill on a running PC can just as easily seep around, short out and fry critical components. Simply opening up the keyboard and cleaning it will not resolved every issue.

[setjeff15081947]

Vista Home Pro® on my H-P Pavilion dv7 laptop. How much to repair it after I hurl it at, and successfully hit, Bill Gates and score. Please do not include the felony conviction on Assault with a Non-deadly Weapon, with time off from an understanding, Vista-Using judge.