• On mySimon: Michael Jackson's: This Is It
February 14, 2008 4:00 AM PST

Social network invites can be a plague

by Daniel Terdiman

If you're like many people deeply wired into a Web 2.0 lifestyle, your inbox is a never-ending flow of invites to new social-networking services.

Day in and day out, it seems, there's a new one. Today it's Notch Up, yesterday it's Naymz. Last week it was Dopplr.

And that's not even counting the steady flow of requests to be someone's friend on LinkedIn, MySpace, Plaxo or Facebook.

For me, it's a constant annoyance. I know I probably should jump on the LinkedIn bandwagon, for example, yet I never have, and frankly, don't expect I ever will. I suppose it's possible that one day, long ago, I created an account. All I know is that every few days, someone I know--often a distant acquaintance--will ask me to be their friend on LinkedIn.

And of course, what follows some set number of days later is a stern automated message warning me that my offer to be that person's friend is going to expire. Darn!

For some people, though, the issue with the constant stream of invites is becoming more than just annoying.

"I'm suffering from sheer invite toxicity," wrote Heather Kelley, the Kraus visiting professor of art at Carnegie Mellon University, to an e-mail list I'm on. "Regardless of source, exclusivity or debatable utility of the service, my immediate response to seeing one in my inbox is 'NOT ANOTHER ONE,' combined with annoyance at the friend who sent it--'What? You expect me to join ANOTHER time-wasting thingy just because you did?'"

And lest you think that Kelley is complaining too much, and why can't she just ignore the invites and move on, remember that for many people, staying connected to their friends, and current or potential professional colleagues is a little like breathing.

Whether that's a good thing is a conversation for another day, but you know these people are hardly rare--you may even be one of them.

And for people like that, there is an intense social and professional pressure to join whatever new social network is on offer, especially if the invite comes from a friend.

"That is pretty much exactly how I feel about it," said Mark De Loura, a San Francisco-based video game technology consultant. "There's enough of a net gain out of joining that I always (feel I have to) do it."

One of the major problems behind the flood of invites is that many of the services seem to mine users' contacts lists for names to send invites, either for joining a new service or for, say, using a Facebook application. Similarly, some systems force users to opt-out of adding their contacts to new invite lists rather than opt-in.

To some, that is a real problem that the companies behind the social networks need to solve.

"That behavior," said Kim Pallister, a technology blogger who works for Intel, "the opt-out spam list is going to piss off the user base...You need to have that be opt-in, not opt-out."

That's particularly true because, practically speaking, since many users quickly click through such opt-outs without noticing what they mean, they may not even see what they're agreeing to.

"The interesting thing about those invites," said Judith Meskill, a longtime social networks observer and blogger, and currently COO of a startup called CrowdFusion, "is that they are being spawned often without the knowledge of the spammer. This practice really must stop."

Meskill suggested that the only way it might stop is if the companies behind some of the services band together to create a set of behavioral regulations.

"It's their industry," Meskill said. "They should be protecting its rep. It really makes the whole industry look bad."

Still, if such standards were to be implemented, it's certainly not going to happen any time soon. And in the interim, the problem of people being endlessly frustrated by more and more invites continues.

One rather well-known tech executive, Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates recently decided to quit Facebook because he was getting more than 8,000 friend requests a day.

That, of course, is an extreme example, but to people like Kelley, the never-ending invites often feel like a plague, and one that simply won't go away.

"I first noticed it like one notices a new allergic reaction," Kelley, who said she is or has been a member of at least 14 social networks, told me by IM. "Over time, I started noticing a more and more negative reaction to each new one that surfaced. It was similar to the feeling of hearing about a new startup during the height of the (dot-com) bubble. It just defied all logic and kind of offended me as a thinking human."

Not everyone, of course, feels that the number of new social networks is a problem. For some, it creates ever-changing ways to connect to important people in their lives, and more focused ways to filter lists of friends and acquaintances.

"I receive invitations for new social networking sites almost every time a new one hits beta," said Souris Hong-Porretta, vice president of interactive media at Entertainment Media Ventures. "I'm not so tired of receiving invites. It's part of my culture and part of my job to know what's out there."

Hong-Porretta said that she's even moderating a panel at the upcoming South by Southwest Interactive festival in Austin, Texas, about such applications.

But even she wishes the services weren't such time-sucks.

"I do sometimes wish that there was a magic button I could push that would fill in all my relevant information for me though."

Hong-Porretta, though, can see why for people less interested in staying abreast of every new service, the invite stream is a problem.

"I'm not surprised people are experiencing social networking site invite fatigue," she said. "The sites are time capital intensive in the beginning...I think people are going to be much more particular about the sites they sign up for now. I think a defining factor will be, 'Is this site useful or helpful to me?'"

One thing some would like to see would be an actual consolidation of the many services, precisely so there isn't social networking site overload.

"What I'd ideally like would be to have a couple different networks, personal and professional (that I could) keep separate," said De Loura. There might be "somebody I might want to connect to for personal reasons, but not for business reasons. (And) there are people I want to protect. I don't want everybody to be linked to execs at Microsoft who have been gracious enough to link to me."

Meskill thinks that De Loura is on the right track. She said she foresees a new set of social network sites that are "strong vertical offerings," sites like Flickr that give users a specific and focused set of things to do.

"I think a new generation of strong, user-focused offerings would be very well received," Meskill said, "in verticals like photos, music, food, tech, etc. Those plays have not arrived yet, however."

The thing is, though, that even if social-networking services do evolve as Meskill suggests, users will still find themselves accosted with nearly daily invites. And that's not necessarily a good thing. Especially when the invites come from friends.

In fact, there's even a term for the invites that come from friends: "bacn."

"It's spam from people you know," said Pallister. "It's worse than spam because you're not sure you should ignore it. 'Did they mean to send this to me? Should I delete it?'"

Meskill said she's aware that bacn has become a big problem on Facebook.

"Friends are dropping friends as friends," Meskill said, "because they are being hammered by a ton of this stuff."

So what's the solution?

It's hard to say. But to people like Meskill, it's become clear that the social network services are going to have to take action soon, or else they're going to risk turning off their users. And these days, it's more important to those companies than ever that that doesn't happen.

"Since we have advanced beyond the first adopters," she said, "and the next wave and are now into the broader wave of medium-to-late adopters, this is more imperative than ever."

Daniel Terdiman is a staff writer at CNET News covering games, Net culture, and everything in between. E-mail Daniel.
Recent posts from Geek Gestalt
Q&A: Bringing back Mickey Mouse's dark side
Bad PDF formatting reveals Google Voice numbers
How the venerable PS2 made it to 9 years old
The tech behind U2's record-smashing tour
Piloting a lunar rover
NASA iPhone app full of surprises for space geeks
PS3: No longer the next-gen console punching bag
U2 concert to be streamed live from Rose Bowl
Add a Comment (Log in or register) (17 Comments)
  • prev
  • 1
  • next
Facebook was ruined by 3rd party apps
by craig.hank February 14, 2008 7:35 AM PST
I couldn't agree more with the comments above. I am sick to death of the constant bombardment of vampire, werewolf, poker, zoosk, petrolheads invites, the list goes on and on. I ignore absolutely every single invite and then block that app from any further invites to protect myself as it spreads around my online contacts. I joined Facebook quite some time ago now and selected it because at the time it was the cleanest and most user friendly interface. Then low and behold Facebook opens up to 3rd party developers and all hell let loose. Its an absolute disgrace, and if it weren't for the fact that Facebook is still pretty useful for keeping in touch with people i'd have shut down my profile a long time ago!! From a very very disgruntled Facebook user!
Reply to this comment
I've given up on them
by eCurmudgeon February 14, 2008 8:22 AM PST
I jut have my mail filters mark every invite as spam, and move them to my spam folder -- then I check them once every month to see if any invite interests me. So far, none have.
Reply to this comment
Social Network Invites
by OmoEko February 14, 2008 8:50 AM PST
Even that is too much trouble - I just just delete them
View reply
Dont use your official mail
by Chocolim February 14, 2008 9:14 AM PST
I cancel all notifications where i can do that, and i put my email spam email address and that way i can avoid 100% of emails from the social network that i am in, then in my spare time i get in and see if there is something interesting to see in my inbox or friends requests
Reply to this comment
Thought
by hanifperry February 14, 2008 9:22 AM PST
I admit that getting asked to join someone's stupid group or someone who lost there cell is annoying but...People are generally excited when old friends connect to say hello. I think companring yourself to Bill Gates is a little pompous. I doubt most of us are that big of celebrities where the old friends saying hello is a problem. If they could only just filter useless friend messages and group invites.
Reply to this comment
Maybe...
by phantomsoul February 14, 2008 10:55 AM PST
Maybe it is a little pompous to compare the everyday user to
known celebrities, but fact of the matter is that many of these
sites have simply become ways to harvest people's email
addresses and then get around spam filters by transmitting
under the cover of coming from your friends.

Let's be very clear here: as far as I'm concerned, any kind of
passive distribution that is not facilitated by a human actively
selecting an address to send something to is spam.

Friends always keep asking me why I don't get automated
messages they keep sending out -- such as invites, etc. I tell
them that it probably went to spam and if they actually value my
friendship, they can take a few minutes to type out a personal
message, even if just a couple lines to say hi. They're friends;
it's a social relationship -- and not a capital one, in which, for
example, I could make more money if I can manage more
contacts successfully.
Are you suffering from Socialnetworkitis?
by maxkalehoff February 14, 2008 9:53 AM PST
Daniel,
Great thoughts. I actually tackled this recently as well in a piece called, "Are You Suffering From Socialnetworkitis?" http://www.attentionmax.com/blog/2007/10/are_you_suffering_from_socialnetworkitis.php

We need some big mega, meta system to manage all these networks as one.
- Max Kalehoff
AttentionMax.com
Reply to this comment
a giant meta network.
by tremorfireheart February 14, 2008 11:45 AM PST
all the friends request from spammers can be annoying to send the other way. I also understand the feeling of one of your friends spamming you. I have one on myspace that uses the bulleting system for things that would probably best be served by the blog function.

The one thing I would like some one to build and if i ever get bored or annoyed enough Ill build it myself, would be a web app that logs into each of my social networking sites and drops my blogging on each one. rather than copying and pasting the blog the 8 times or so into first myspace, then my deviant art and then gaea and so forth etc.
tremorfireheart@yahoo.com
Reply to this comment
MySpace porn spam is the worst
by Pete Bardo February 14, 2008 11:58 AM PST
Don't know about anyone else, but most of the friend requests I get from MySpace are really spam ads for porn sites. I'm not exactly a prude, but, do I really need to see someone--man or woman--with their pants down? Everyday? At work? Oops, I'm not supposed to be ding this at work. Then again, I do occasionally actually use friends as work contacts.

Maybe my photo is inviting for porn spammers.
Reply to this comment
The Best Solution is to Join A Group
by WJeansonne February 14, 2008 12:52 PM PST
I think the best solution is to join a specialist group in Linkedin. Then, just ping people as you need them or wish to start a dialogue. So many people on Linked are hooked on impressing people by their number of linked in connections. Big whoop!

Personally, I don't see how you can be friends or associates with more than say, 250 people max. Yet, the show offs (LOL) brag about having 1,500 links! Guy Kawasaki even how was sort of embarrassed about the number of connections in his private network on Linkedin.
Reply to this comment
"SOCIAL NETWORK SERVICES"?
by walwebster February 14, 2008 4:28 PM PST
As someone who spotted that gotcha in these generous offers from a mile off, pardon me for dissenting, but aren't these so-called "social network services" just hangouts for time-wasters who are paranoid about missing anything?

Recognize that one of the most precious things you possess is your privacy -- you should be insisting that if others want to take it away from you, and mine your contact lists just so they can float unsolicited advertisements in front of everyone you know, or sell that opportunity on to someone else, then THEY should be paying YOU. Handsomely, too.
Reply to this comment
Don't feel guilty
by Smartmandaily February 14, 2008 5:31 PM PST
Great piece. I especially liked the quotation from Healther about
how she felt pressured to join some "thingy" just because her
friends had joined. I say join and use what you want to join and
use, and don't feel guilty about not participating in things that you
don't perceive to be beneficial.
David
www.smartmandaily.com
Reply to this comment
by DevManiac June 14, 2008 3:56 PM PDT
I think the surge in social networks will reside given the fact that most depend on click through ads for funding. This will be a major issue for them as users are becoming more and more "blind" to PPC ads. The only way they can survive long term is to charge for their services. Or develop top-notch ad campaigns with major businesses as apposed to low-key click client ads.

DevManiac,
Social Network Graphics Management
Reply to this comment
by victorantos December 6, 2008 4:39 AM PST
I think social networks have a lot of benefits, probably if you are some one important person wi'll get sick of daily emails from social networks, but if you are an average person,like me( <a href="http://victorantos.com" title="asp.net C# web developer">web developer from uk</a>), you'll get a lot of new contacts/friends and fun!
Reply to this comment
by victorantos December 6, 2008 4:40 AM PST
I think social networks have a lot of benefits, probably if you are some one important person wi'll get sick of daily emails from social networks, but if you are an average person,like me ( http://victorantos.com web developer in uk), you'll get a lot of new contacts/friends and fun!
Reply to this comment
by victorantos December 6, 2008 4:41 AM PST
I think social networks have a lot of benefits, probably if you are some one important person wi'll get sick of daily emails from social networks, but if you are an average person,like me( [url="http://victorantos.com"]web developer from UK[/url]), you'll get a lot of new contacts/friends and fun!
Reply to this comment
(17 Comments)
  • prev
  • 1
  • next
advertisement

After 5 years, Firefox faces new challenges

Mozilla helped reshape the Web since releasing Firefox 1.0 five years ago. Now it's got a reawakened Microsoft and Google Chrome to reckon with.

There's a map for that: GPS or smartphone?

Almost every handset comes with mapping software these days, but standalone GPS devices are becoming more affordable than ever.

About Geek Gestalt

Daniel Terdiman, uniquely positioned to take you into the middle of another side of technology, chronicles his explorations of the "fun beat," from cultural phenomena such as Burning Man to cutting-edge aircraft to game conventions.

Add this feed to your online news reader

Geek Gestalt topics

advertisement
advertisement

Inside CNET News

Scroll Left Scroll Right