Cell phone is mom-avoidance device for teens

SAN FRANCISCO--Tweens and teens are pushing parents to adopt text messaging so they don't have to talk "live" over the cell phone, according to mobile phone executives.

A typical teenager carrying a cell phone might let mom's call roll over to voicemail and then immediately text her back, "What going on?," according to Stephen Saiz, manager of consumer insight and strategy of the Walt Disney Internet Group's North American mobile division.

"Teens are pushing their parents to go on mobile because they don't really want to communicate with them directly," Saiz said here on a panel of mobile executives at the YPulse 2008 National Mashup, a two-day conference on teens and technology.

He said later in an interview that his Disney division researches teens' and parents' behavior on the cell phone and with its mobile applications. The majority of older audiences using Disney mobile applications skew to mothers who are goaded there by their kids, he said. And most tweens and teens prefer to text message and instant chat with parents and friends rather than talk directly so that they can continue doing other things like play video games with friends, he said.

More broadly, nearly one out of every two U.S. tweens (or kids between 10 and 13 years old) and 83 percent of teens own a cell phone, according to new research from Chicago-based C&R Research. And with that many kids using mobile devices, the text messages are flying.

The average teen, according to C&R, generates between 50 and 70 text messages a day, or as many as 18,000 a year.

Despite the flurry of activity, it's not all about mobile communication for teens anymore. More U.S. teens are looking for social networking and entertainment via the cell phone. Saiz, for example, said that young people are looking for full-length video on the mobile phone, despite the perception that kids just want to "info-snack," or consume small bits of information. "Young people are looking for long-form content," he said.

[wxcc2004]

It's called "rude". Is "rudeness" a new trend? It's pure stupidity that teenage children "need" a cell phone to begin with. Oh, I forgot, absentee parents feel better giving the kids a cell phone for "communication". How dumb of me.

If my kids had a cell phone of their own, it would get instantly taken away, if they were rude to me as a parent by not answering the cell when they could have.

[k2dave]

I have heard the term helicopter parents, parents who continuously hover over their children. In the early years this is good, but when they are teens they need some time to be on their own and try to make some of their own decisions as part of their growth process, and they parents to fall back upon and to provide lose guidance. Technology, such as cell phones, no longer allows this essential part of their growth if the parents control them to much, hold them back, and don't allow it. The teens are forced into a powerless relationship with their parents which never allow them to grow beyond early childhood emotionally. The only power they have remaining is to not answer the call, txt msging allows them to communicate the only way left to them they can truly express themselves . Some may call this passive aggression, but I think the term passive resistance is more appropriate as they are just trying striving for healthy growth, and really a cry for help.

[gjl229]

I don't know where to begin, Dave. As a parent, I simply want to talk to my children on occasion: not hourly, not every evening out. But when it's important to me.

If it's a power thing, then I'll eagerly agree. I'm the parent. They have choices and responsibilities, but I'm still the parent and responsible for their upbringing. The amount of direction needed decreases over the years but the responsibility does not go away. The need for real communication does not go away.

I have every right to talk with my children - to hear their voices, guage their responses. They communicate far more via an interactive voice conversation than the very simple text message, one usually lacking in anything more complicated than basic (and abbreviated) nouns. There is no way that texting is more expressive and more nuanced than a two-way voice conversation among people who know one another well. I shudder to imagine the child that cannot express him/herself any better than GTG/LOL/etc.

I care deeply about my kids and won't be satisfied with a text message that boils down to "whatever ...."

[k2dave]

What I posted was not suppose to be a blanket statement, nor against anyone, but somethings I noticed about your post I wish to address. You posted that 'I want', and 'When it's important to me', which tends to indicate a self centered view - but this is not the best forum to discern if this is a issue or not.

For some people, it is really impossible for them to truly express themselves via a voice conversation if the other party has a great deal of power over them, and they end up telling you what they expect you want to hear, and really may be fearful, anxious, or in other ways discouraged talking openly and may only be pretending to talk openly. I think you would be shocked as to how many children can best freely communicate via written form (email/txt mgs/message boards).




I have no doubt that you care deeply care for your kids, that has really no relevance however as the father who locked his daughter in the celler dungeon for 24 years also would have said and believed he cared deeply about his kids. Please don't take this as I'm placing you in his situation, just that caring deeply really does not negate unintentional damage to the emotional development of a person.

[gara1961]

gjl229,
I agree with you. I can't stand when kids are disrespectful to adults let alone their parents. Obviously, there are a lot of kids out there that feel they should be given everything in life. My daughter is 14 and hasn't been given a cell yet. I will determine if/when she needs one--only for communicating with me or my wife--not her spoiled friends.

[Crankypaul]

Disrespectful children are too often a product of the parenting they received growing up. The ongoing generations all have become less and less respectful of the previous ones, and for the most part the finger points to the previous gens skills (or lack of) at parenting. If my child had a cellphone as a boy (he's now 28) and played the games outlined here, after the first warning the phone would have promptly been taken away. Disrespectful children are taught by disrespectful parents. My wife teaches pre-school and watches the out of control children that are the offspring of essentially out of control parents.

[sshtdifferentday]

This is nothing new. When I got my first cell phone back in 2001, my mother would call me (mind you I was in college and paying my own bill) and I wouldn't answer her calls. It was cheaper for me to txt her than pick up her call. When she asked I told her exactly that reasoning and that she needs to learn how to text.

7 years later she has a PDA phone and can text wtih the rest of them.

[mishmash0101]

The day that either of my teenage son's don't pick up my call and answer back with a text is the day that I will throw their cellphone in the trash. End of discussion.

[kenright60660]

I think that most of the parents responding to this are overreacting. Texting is a new way of communication, and, as with all new things is a conservative society, it is frowned upon for the most part. Taking a call is not always the most simple thing to do as a person interacting with the real world, I happen to live in a city, if I am in a noisy area, it would probably be better to text someone than to attempt at conversing over a cell phone. Texting should not be seen as not taking the call, but as taking it in a different way. Someone taking a call by responding with a text message isn't trying to be rude, they may be busy, unable to talk at the moment, or may not be in an area conducive to phone conversations (as in, a place where they break up, or get many dropped calls).

As for lack of expression, what is so important that a parent needs to gauge a child's emotional reaction to everything that they say? If you ask where they are, they will probably tell you, and are probably more likely to be truthful in a text message. If you are calling because of a change of plans, it is probably better to text that change anyways, so that they have a record of it. If you are calling to scold them, then it's probably a better idea to do it in person anyways.


And as for parents saying that their children do not need cell phones, maybe you should think of yourself as a teenager, and how having a cell phone would have changed the way you would have done things as one. Having a cell phone allows them to call you from wherever they are. Instead of "why are you home an hour late!," They can call you from the bus/train/car and describe to you the reason why they are going to be late. They can Be reached when you need to reach them, and it allows for them to be able to reach you when they need to. By texting or by talking, the result is the same. Cell phones allow you to have more knowledge of your child, and allow you to take more responsibility, while allowing them a little bit more control in their own lives. Just because they respond with a text, does not mean that they are trying to be rude.