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Gingrich: Space colony yay! Romney: Nay!

One shouldn't hold one's nose when politicians talk of space travel.

One should merely hold one's judgment until they've all finished and then simply emit whatever emotions might have built up in one's intestines over the minutes.

Tonight, the Republican presidential candidates debated in Jacksonville, Fla. It just so happens that jobs in Florida have flown many of its coops--and this just happens to be a state that has become a little synonymous with blasting off to the moon.

So here we had Newt Gingrich, squeezing himself gingerly into Neil Armstrong's boots. For yesterday … Read more

Energy-efficient windows are melting my Prius, woman says

Everyone with a live mind who happens not to work for an oil company knows that we must harness our energy.

The possibilities are vast. Consider, for example, Heather Patron of Studio City, Calif., and her Prius. Everything plastic on it began to melt. The side-view mirrors, for example.

This seemed a little odd. She took it to Toyota. The company said there was nothing wrong with the car.

And then she noticed her neighbor's energy-efficient windows that seemed to be directing a concentrated beam of energy-efficient light towards her energy-efficient vehicle.

Patron told CBS Los Angeles: "I'… Read more

The saddest man at CES

LAS VEGAS -- The Consumer Electronics Show is like the real world in only one sense: everyone is trying to capture your attention.

So if they can't do it with dancing girls, they hire actors and professional presenters who are there to lure you to a company's wares.

This morning, for example, Panasonic and Samsung were employing more flashing lights than Amsterdam. They talk at you, they play music, they activate multifarious screens at passing eyes -- everything to halt your gait and grab your eyes and brain.

Every company at CES garnered some kind of crowd. Every … Read more

The saddest man at CES

LAS VEGAS -- The Consumer Electronics Show is like the real world in only one sense: everyone is trying to capture your attention.

So if they can't do it with dancing girls, they hire actors and professional presenters who are there to lure you to a company's wares.

Every company at CES garnered some kind of crowd. Every … Read more

CES 2012: Are the dancing girls really necessary?

LAS VEGAS--She isn't wearing much. What she is wearing is shiny and silvery. She's dancing in front of you, though her heart doesn't seem to be in it.

It's 10.30 a.m. And yes, it is Vegas. And yes, it is CES 2012.

Every year, one imagines that there will be fewer dancing girls. Every year, one is entirely mistaken.

My first--but surely not my only--dancing girl sighting Monday morning was at the booth occupied by Vietnamese robotics company TOSY.

This is the company that tomorrow will bring attendees the rapturous glee of witnessing Justin … Read more

CES 2012: German gaming company's war joke backfires

Funny isn't easy. It's also mercurial. One person's funny is another person's "I would very much like to strike you in the face with my umbrella."

As the doors of CES 2012 opened to admit the excited and the hungover, the lengths and depths of funny were tested just a little.

I happened on the booth belonging to Roccat, a German gaming hardware company based in Hamburg.

Adorning its exterior was an ad that read: "ZEE GERMANS ARE COMING. DON'T WORRY. THIS TIME WE'LL PLAY NICE."

In small type at … Read more

CES 2012, as seen by engineers who went to the dark side

LAS VEGAS--While teams of people worked through the night to get their booths looking pretty--or at least not pretty awful-- there were some who could lounge a little and be glad that all they had to do was sip a little wine.

Fortunately, I was allowed to be embedded with them--in the Iraq sense, you understand--in order to get an understanding of just how these devious minds saw CES 2012.

When I speak of these devious minds, I do not even think of Justin Bieber's management team. No, I bow in reverence to those whose jobs it is to … Read more

The smartest flat-screen thief ever

As I prepare my head, heart, liver, and patience for CES, I know that many of the items displayed there will trumpet their sheer slimness.

I imagine that many people will be consumed by their desire to get hold of something so thin as to be almost invisible.

Anticipating this, LG has released this lovely ad in the Netherlands, in order to show the most technologically aware method of shoplifting a very thin flat-screen TV.

I am indebted to Creativity, which presented this example of beautiful creativity.

For most of the spot, you wonder what the man is doing in … Read more

The joy of Microsoft's 'avoid ghetto' GPS patent

Pedestrians have sometimes felt neglected when it comes to GPS directions.

Indeed, not so long ago, one lady sued Google because the directions its map offered led her (she believed) to be struck by a car.

Now Microsoft has been granted a patent that is designed to make its maps more pedestrian-friendly.

Somehow, this patent has immediately been dubbed the "avoid ghetto" feature.

The gist of it seems to be that Microsoft's GPS--which will reportedly be inserted into Windows Phones in the future--will use input from more varied and up-to-date sources in order to create suggested routes. … Read more

Hawking: I think about women most

I need to disabuse you. Men do not think about sex every seven seconds, as some would have it.

However, they do think about their target sex--be it men, women or other--constantly.

As living proof, might I offer renowned physicist Stephen Hawking. He shouldn't be offering living proof of anything; when he was diagnosed with motor-neuron disease at the age of 21, few thought he would last another 49 years.

Still, in a 70th birthday interview with New Scientist, Hawking finally admitted that physics, Einstein, the Cosmos, aliens--oh, it's all so much dogged piffle when compared to the … Read more